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Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2008 7:28 am
by Baeta
I'll emphasize on my title. When I went nails done for one of the first times(which is a universal girl thing to do when you're feeling bad or want to pamper yourself)i figured it would be relaxing and great. however, i came out more stressed and ready to cry then i was before i went in! the nail people started with my good arm, which they were fine. then i realized i had to show them my right arm(where my BP is) and i started panicking. when they asked for it i laughed and tried to explain it to them and they just stared! it was horrifying! in defense to the nail salon they recovered fast and tried the best they could to do my nails (my hand in a bit smaller and some of my finger are deformed) so i sat there feeling horribly awkward, ready to cry when the nail guy started tugging on my fingers which hurt soooooo bad. but i felt ashamed so i just took the pain. when i left I cried in my fiance's car. i ended up messing up a 40 dollar nail job when my fingers smeared the paint.....it was a terrible experience!!! So i was wondering if anyone has been in a terribly awkward moment because of their BP and how did you deal with it?
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2008 5:51 pm
by Kath
Beth
I've had so many of those moments and just when I think it does not bother me something happens to trigger those old feelings. I have not had as many since I learned so much about our injury and how it happened. Once your are more knowledgeable about obpi you will become more comfortable talking about. I use these moment to spread Awareness and Prevention. But I found UBPN just after if formed in 1999. So it's much easier for me now. I am also much older than you and more comfortable with explaining my injury. But I have not forgotten those days when I was still hiding my arm.
When I bought the gown for my son's wedding I picked out a beautiful dress. Of course, it had to be altered and the dressmaker kept commenting on how she never had a alter a dress so much because of the size difference in my shoulder and arm along with my back. My body is smaller on the right side. If you measure mid-line to spine. I was upset and did not know what to do but laugh it off. It was before I had answers for those people who are really not trying to be mean. They are a bit thoughtless and don't realize they are making us uncomfortable.
Once you have answers and begin to tell people this happened to you while the doctor was delivering you and it's a birth INJURY not a BIRTH DEFECT it seems people are interested in knowing how to prevent it.
I know just how you feel and waisting all that money to have it ruined... ugh.
I have always had to explain why I can't turn my hand over when they massage your hands. Next time explain your injury first and expect them to be gentle and respectful of your needs. You are paying for a service and I bet they will be more than willing to accommodate you.
Kath robpi/adult
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2008 8:32 pm
by Carolyn J
Ohhhh My, Beth! Wow! Yeah, I've had dumb people to stuff like that... but it sure made me feel beter when I figure out Pedicures and Massages and having my hair done at a salon made my life easier besides pampering myself.
Yes, I agree with Kath that armed wsith the knowledge shared here, I've learned to educate Awareness for OBPI's & the resut is that "they" as questions and make me feel soooo smart to!...I need that,LOL.
HUGS,
Carolyn J
LOBPI/69 & Counting
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2008 8:44 pm
by marieke
Beata,
I think at one point or another in our lives we have gone through something like that. What you need to do is find a simple and concise way to explain what you have and say it with confidence. Tell them what you need for them to be careful of or what they can do to avoid you hurting like that. It takes time to come up with a way to say stuff like that, and the more it comes up the easier it is. Start with telling friends/family, practice on the if that makes it easier.
Good luck, and don't forget, we are all here to support each other!
Marieke (32, LOBPI)
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 2:28 am
by Baeta
Thank you sooo much for the feedback. I never really think to explain my arm to anyone because i am so used to it! I think i'll try a nail place again (because it wasn't all bad) and explain it to them. when i had to take CPR for my work the teacher was so very helpful and understanding. I'm going to man myself with information next time i have to do something with my hands. Thanks for the support.
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 6:42 pm
by marieke
Glad to hear it! You go girl!
Marieke (32, LOBPI)
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 8:06 pm
by MaureenK
I never get manicures anymore, and I completely forgot why until my boyfriend's mother took me out to get a manicure over Christmas. It was so uncomfortable, and I smudged the heck out of it-- but it could have been worse. Over Christmas I survived a manicure and family photos, both of which suck for us with a BPI.
I worked a lot of cashier type jobs, and I frequently attempted to take change with my BPI hand (because my other hand was full). Since I can't supinate, I just end up making a cup shape with my hand to accept the change. People would just stare at me until I realized what I was doing. ....Awkward.
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 4:16 am
by Baeta
I worked some cashier jobs too it was terribly awkward. I usually just put the change on the counter and counted it out that way! I used to do a lot of stocking and maintenance jobs before i started working with kids with autism and it was tough. I remember working as pool maintenance and i couldn't hold the hose to clean the pool underwater with my arm so i stepped on it. Then i accidentally suctioned the hose to my leg! it was painful, but i laugh about it now.
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 1:30 am
by karategirl1kyu
Ive had a few cashier jobs too, and i hear you on the change thing... i figured out a way to do everything with my right arm.. and though it may look funny to others- it works.
another awkward moment- my friend asked me to go to the drive up atm, i was like i'm going to have to get out of the car (i have LOBPI)! she was like- you can do it... i ended up opening the door and hanging out the window in such an awkward fashion that anyone who saw the atm tape prolly had a fit of laughter!
~Mel
Re: Does anyone else have awkward moments?
Posted: Mon Apr 07, 2008 3:27 am
by smith727
Being an OBPI with a right side injury and an unarmed self defense instructor... you want to talk about awkward?
Every time I have to teach a women's rape defense course, it is a hassle. I just start out anymore with this statement:
"Before we get started I want you all to realize that I have a brachial plexus injury to my right arm and shoulder, so if some of these techniques look a little awkward, or the uncommon way that I use my right arm causes you to not understand the technique, stop me and let me know; it's okay, you won't embarrass me."
Since I started doing that, it seems to make everyone more comfortable, and the whole thing seems to flow smoother.