United Brachial Plexus Network, Inc.

Why are they nervous?
Why are they scared?
Why is Mommy crying?
Why are they kissing me so much?
Why are they telling me they love me all the time?
What’s going on?
What does the word surgery mean anyway?
Is something going to happen to ME?
Why are they telling me not to be scared?
Why are they moving so fast, faster and faster?
Where am I going?
What is this place?
Why is it so bright?
Why are they all looking at me?
Why do I have to change my clothes?
Why do I have to lay on this bed?
Why do I have to take this medicine?
Why is the room spinning?
What is this room?
What is that big thing on the ceiling?
Why is it so cold in here?
Why can’t I see their faces?
Why does this smell like strawberries?
Why am I an astronaut floating in space?
Why do I hear voices in the shadows?
What’s the bright light?
Why does my throat hurt?
Why does my body hurt?
What is the beeping sound?
Where is my mommy?
What has happened to me?
Why do I hurt so much?
Where is my arm?
What’s on my arm?
Why can’t I move my arm?
Why am I so tired?
Why did I just puke?
Where am I going?
What is this room?
Where is my mommy?
Why am I so sleepy?
Where is my mommy?
Where is my daddy?
What’s on my arm?
Mommy?
Why am I in this room?
Why am I so tired?
What happened to me?

wow that was powerful... kinda sad, huh? Kids see things differently than we do, that is for sure. When Ian came home from the primary surgery, Ashley, my 6 yr old went NUTS... she thought they cut off his arm because it was under his clothes, we laugh about that now, but it never occurred to me to prepare her... I have noticed also that Ian is more leery when we go to therapy and when we go to the doctor.He has only started acting like that since the mod quad. I am sure he had those questions floating around in his little mind...This poem gives us a perspective that at least I didn't really have before. Very well done.

Thank you for the excellent questions, I couldn't agree more.

Lenni

Matthew's mom (maia's friend) had to have an infection on her toe drained today. Matthew asked her if she was going to come home with her arm out in a splint like Maia's. Somehow he connected all surgeries with Maia's arm out to the side....even if it was toe surgery. I guess we don't know how all of this gets translated in kid's minds.

After reading this I tried to put myself back when I had knee surgery and when you are drugged and come to - everything is so wierd. Can't imagine how this works out in our kid's heads. Maia doesn't consciously remember much- I think they gave her a lot of Versed this last time....it's an amnesiac. I wonder if that's a good thing or bad thing? Guess we'll find out from a psychologist some day.

-francine

...as I ponder this poem more I wonder how Maia answered these questions in her own mind? Every surgery brings a new psychology to this household and a new set of issues... Maybe this has opened a door for us. I did role playing with her (and her playmobil operating room ) before her surgery - maybe it's time to revisit the toy operating room and see if she has anything she wants to share about it.

-francine

WOW. I am glad that Aaron was too young to remember all the details.

This sure did make me think. We were at the doctor's the other day and Kayla was having a test done in which she had to have an oxygen mask on. Before they put it on her she turned to me and asked me if it was going to put her to sleep. I had to turn my head so she would not see the tears in my eyes.

Angie