United Brachial Plexus Network, Inc.

I should introduce ourselves my husband mike and i jennifer just had our son Ryan Matthew has been daignosed with bpi/mild cerebral palsy we haven't even had the mri so i don't know how hes cp.I've always told he pediatrician Dr dorfman about his r arm.When he was born there was swelling around the arm but no bruising I was having him breech so they did emergency c- section.They failed to tell us he had swallowed miconium and had to be aspirated.He had to have forceps because he was lodged in my pelvis and respiration was dropping I insisted they do something on 9/19 I was very upset when my son attempted to crawl up the ladder with his l hand r elbow."He's not out growing it".He never grabbed are finger when he was a month old.ryan didnot like to lie in a swing be rocked ly flat on his back many things now i look back.When it was time for the walker I bought him the biggest brightest toys trying to get him to reach for it.He couldn't.I thought he just wouldn't we still did not know what we were dealing with.My son started crawling with his body on the floor like a military crawl for combat that soon irratated him.ryan started pulling up on things just holding on standing there.he didn't start walking to til 13 mo balance not good.Falls alot. I'd been to the dr office 17 times still nothing ."Well wait hes probally left handed"well now we know the dr saying "To late for surgery hes already 18 mos"."Sorry".No were "sorry" sorry i trusted the Dr,I didn't push them to the limite sorry I had trusted my dr,( my employer kaiser)i thought since i work with them I hand a better hand.I mean i'm a medical assitant/tech I should be in right? WRONG!i feel like I've wronged my son and my family I'm the mother I should of known. I work in the hospital.So why don't I get the help he needs?I feel like every door I try to open they shut back in my face.We went to p.t but the therapist said he feels like were ganging up on him he said"Your 3 to 1 agaist me."Sorry" my husband and I will always stand together with our son Ryan.I'm so frustrated!We applied at shriners it takes a month to get on the list please prey for us. They've done o xrays o ct scan mri not til the nov 11 please god give us strength.Also prey for my husband mike who always holds everything in.Hes not much to tell me how he feels without voicing it with anger.I know he doesn't mean it.He too, is frustraded and depressed. We also have a son dylan spain all star soccer player who wishes his arm would't work so mom could do his home work.lol.I myself talk to anyone anywhere mabe to much but I don't know what else to do?I can't sleep, I can't eat ,which is a first god knows i need to lose the weight!lol Is there anyone who found out later?Or I'm I the only one in the dark?

Dear Jennifer,

I am so sorry that you have joined our exclusive "not-so-little" club. My daughter is 3 years old now, and although her recovery is coming along quite well, I deal with the guilt on a daily basis, tears, hate, & unfortunately, overeating. I don't think I've had a good night sleep for at least 3 years.
All I can advise, is to really try to find a good pt & ot, try the early intervention program in your state(its free & free of insurance interference), they may at least have more compassion & understanding of your latest feelings.
This board is great too, & check out the :
www,injurednewborn.com website of Francine's experiences, although you might need more tissue when you see all the poor children who have been needlessly injured due to doctors & insurance companies greed, greed, greed...
Best of luck, Monika

Thank you for responding,it helps just knowing I'm not alone.What kind of bpi does yor daughter have?has she had surgery?I have looked on injured newborn and heard alot of storys its so sad this is more common then I relized you don't hear about this.

Thank you for responding,it helps just knowing I'm not alone.What kind of bpi does yor daughter have?has she had surgery?I have looked on injured newborn and heard alot of storys its so sad this is more common then I relized you don't hear about this.

I tried to e-mail you but it came back....it bounced! I've never heard that term before but that's what the message said.
My e-mail is olafferty@triconet.org
T.

This is not the end of your world but a new beginning, lots of people find things out that are devastating as you have but its NOT their fault, so just because its you yourself finding something out doesnt mean you can make it your fault either, fault is a stupid word I think, go with your responsibility, you can be responsible only for that which you know about so now you know, Maybe there was some divine reason your child should not have had surgery earlier and maybe it was a divine intervention that kept you from it up untill now, there are many things including surgery that you can do at this late time also, altho I am not one to talk about surgery before other options, welcome to the message boards and to the BPI "ways" its not all bad, chin up...you will be ok, it will get better, please post again and let us know how you are.