United Brachial Plexus Network, Inc.

Tabitha is in kindergarten with a LOPBI. She has always been behind and learned at her own pace. She has really struggled this year in kindergarten. Everything from witting to learning all the letters and numbers and even kids excepting her. Her teacher says that she believes she will not be ready for first grade but she also does not think she should be held back. I don't know what to do. Has anyone else been in this situation? What did you do how did you help them from being excepted to understanding there school work? Please help i don't know what to do but I know that i hate seeing by 5 year old go through this and i feel helpless.
Thanks, Tisha Redden

Where in the school year does Tabitha fall? Is she the youngest?

What is the teacher doing to assist Tabitha in learning the skills she is teaching in the class? Complaining to you is not the answer.

Have you had Tabitha tested for other issues? Does she have trouble learning rote things? colors, counting, animals, the sounds they make? Perhaps she has a learning issue like dyslexia (it is a whole lot more than flipping "b" and "d").

I think it is time for a sit down with the teacher. You need a plan. Find out what she is doing for Tabitha, demand the school test her further, and see what you can do at home. One of my friends children just seemed slower than her other kids were and the other kids in school. The teacher didn't think much of it, but my friend did. So, she put her daughter in a tutoring program (she used Score!) and brought her twice a week. It took a year and a half, but now she is thriving. She is in third grade and just finished the second Harry Potter book.

Juliana, who is now in third grade, was slow to start as well. We knew she was bright, but she didn't speak, she didn't want to answer questions, she had few friends. I really worried about her. All that is history now. She has friends-though she's not the "have a million friends" type. She gets extra time on tests because she writes with the wrong hand. We have some processing issues when she's tired (part of the off-hand writing). We also have been lucky to have very understanding teachers. She has a very low frustration level, however.

Good luck, let us know how everything goes.

claudia

Tabitha & Emma's MOm,
Please consider having Tabitha tested for Sensory Sensitivity Issues also, as a number of us BPI-er's have them. I'll bring up the Topic threads on Sensory Dysfuntion Issues for you.

Please let us know how things go for you and Tabitha.

HUGS,
Carolyn J
LOBPI/ adult over-aged

WE had the same problem with Brandon. In kindergarten, he was one of the youngest. He struggled with learning adn adjusting to "SCHOOL LIFE" he was the youngest of four. They suggested we put him in school and wait and see. He was so far behind in January that they thought they would hold him back, however, in APRIL of his kindergarten year, he just kind of woke up and caught up. The kindergarten teacher was rather inpressed. He cannot be stopped now that he is in the fourth grade. Good luck and check on the Sensory ISSUES, they are fun to deal with, but once you know how, she will excel !!!
GAYLE mom of Brandon 9 1/2 ROBPI

I think sensory issues have a lot to do with how a child can process information.
I know I've said it before but some children cannot sit in the middle of mass confusion.
They need to on the fringe of the classroom.

I know when I was in the middle of the class seating I just shut down...
They were always telling my mother I was staring out the window and daydreaming.
I guess that was better than acting out.

Please check on the sensory issues they can really drive a child to distraction...
Some of my issues sometimes really annoy me and I wish some dumb things did not bother me so much... but it is what it is.
At least now I now why some things that others don't even notice annoy me to death.
I don't have to try to hide what is bothering me and I have a name for it.
When I say I have sensory issues people don't usually try to talk me out of my feelings.
I'm lucky my husband just looks at me an laughs.
He still thinks there just little quirks...LOL.
After 43 year of marriage he just rolls his eyes and fixes what he can that is driving me nuts.
Overhead light drive me crazy and fluorescent lights are the worst...

Kath robpi/adult

I had the same problem with my daughter(no BPI). Last year in Kindergarten, she was very far behind, her teacher was very concerned and wanted her to be in Special Education. At that time she didn't qualify for S.E., she wasn't failing.

This year in first grade, she began to fail, I insisted that she be tested and she qualified for S.E. I took her to our pediatrician and he wanted to try ADHD medicines for her. I didn't want to do this, but it worked a miracle for her!! She is now almost caught up with the rest of 1st grade, reading great, writing great(she had OT for handwriting and now has stopped, all in 3 months time) As for the friends thing, she still (I hate to say this) doesn't really have any which is hard to see. I am her Girl Scout leader and I see all of these other girls running around and having a good time together, but she wants no part of that. I am calling her doctor tomorrow and having her tested for Anemia, she never was a good eater before she started the meds, but now she is always tired(which I know can be a side effect too). She sleeps 11 1/2 hours a night and is 7years old. She is always tired and crabby!!

Not to say that meds are the answer, but it worked a miracle for my little Bailey. Her self confidence is way up!! She is so proud of her A-plus 100's that she brings home. Just wish now that I could help her with the friends thing...

I suggest that you have the school test her to rule out learning disabilities. Perhaps she isn't "ready" for kindergarten/first grade and you should have her repeat Kindergarten. There is nothing wrong with doing this. My 4th grade RBPI daughter is the youngest in her class...my gut told me back in Preschool/Kindergarten to wait another year but I got pressure from the teachers and from home to start her. She is gifted in several areas but learning disabled too...what a mix. She can't write well or do math facts. The bottom line is, she is also immature for her grade. Every year I wanted to have her repeat that grade but, again, was pressured into sending her along because she's bright. Here we are in 4th grade and I beat myself up all the time for not letting her repeat kindergarten or lst or 2nd or 3rd grade. Now I'd have to put her in a different school because of the stigma attached to holding her back at her age. In Kindergarten it would have been a non-issue. Talk to the school psychologist to have her tested. The bottom line is, she is YOUR child and you know her best. If, at the end of Kindergarten, you think she should repeat Kindergarten, then do it. Is she in half-day kindergarten? Is there a full-day Kindergarten? Could she do a full-day kindergarten? Some children just don't have the stamina and maturity to be ready for kindergarten. THAT'S OK! I held my first two children back and they started at 6 yrs. old and they definitely benefited from the wait. Wish I would have had the sense to do it with my 3rd child. sigh.

Tabitha is the youngest in her class. She turned 5 after school had started on August 27. She knows her colors and abc and the common things in kindergarten. She can write most of the letters and some numbers. She does receive OT and does have a para because she has no left hand function. She does have trouble making friends i never thought kids could be so mean so young but it doesn't seem to bother her because we have a large family who love her just the way she is. I will talk to the school about learning issues. I just can not decide what to do because she struggles in some areas but she is so SMART in other areas. Thank you all for telling me your stories, they are really helping me.

Just my 2 cents - I work in the school system and the last 2 years we have looked more at keeping some of the kinder. kids back if needed. The few kids this was done with are very successful now. Their confidence was boosted and they have truly shined. They were able to work with a new group of kids (sometimes that can be for the better). I would speak to the school about programs they offer aditionally. If it's a half day program, find out if therapy can be after the schooling time so they are not missing any classroom time, etc. See if they have any extra programs. We have a wraparound program that works with kids that are stuggling. Mostly - be a squeeky wheel! Make sure they know you are not going away without answers! That is the only way to get what you need in a school system! Be your childs advocate and think of it like your job! Do not be shut down by their first ability to dismiss you.