United Brachial Plexus Network, Inc.

I just wanted to vent a little, well ok alot! A couple months back I had to go to the store to buy an outfit for a party we were attending (because I gained about 40lbs due to illness and all the medications) nothing in my closet fit. Ok no big deal..........well I put on a shirt and it got stuck and I couldn't get if off. So I had to call for help which is very hard to do. Thank God the sale lady was very nice and made the situation a little more bearable. Of course until I got in the car and called my husband sobbing!! Well last night I ran to the store to get aspirin for our dog and it was on the top shelf and I couldn't reach it. I tried my usual on my tippy toes and even jumped a bit. I went to ask for help again and it was the manager no less. Well when she asked what I needed help with and I told her she looked at me like, your taller then me and you can't reach the aspirin!!! Like I was bothering her and just wanted to ask for help because I didn't want to reach so high!! So of course when I came home I was very upset again. When you look at me you really can't tell even though my left arm just hangs and my right there is movement and I can bend it at the elbow but I can't straighen it up. Well sorry for going on and on but I knew somebody out there would understand. Thank you for the ears!!!
Love,
Gina Mc

Hello there,
I totally understand! Having only "one good" arm makes reaching for things VERY HARD. I've gotten very frustrated/angry with myself due to not being able to take or put things on to high shelves. I feel for you, I know that feeling oh too well.


*hugs* for that.

Also, I can't fit into my old clothes that much but for the opposite reason since my accident (march 2006). I have lost 10-15 kilograms. So my old clothes either hang off me really loosely and/or fall down/off me due to being too big!

Gina, things like that can be frustrating, I certainly know. I'm short with a bum arm! I think the "strongest" step I took in controlling those potentially embarassing and selfconscious moments like that was to hit them full force head on. Once I started hitting them head on and controlling how the interaction moved, I felt a lot more comfortable with myself (though maybe I'm a jerk now?).

For example, if you know you have to ask for help, and you know the clerk will more than likely give you a stupid response, you just have to be ready to say "Because my left/right arm doesn't work and I cannot reach. Will you help me please." Put the awkward ball in their court. I realize that may be sort of a jerk move, but most often people don't realize that an "inconvenient request" to them is a serious issue for someone else. Instead of giving them a chance to make me feel bad, I throw the whole thing out on the table. I guess a psych would say that's a defense mechanism, and it is, but it works. It might even teach the clerk to think next time they open their mouth instead of giving the next person a hasty reaction.

I am not TBPI, I am a mother of an OBPI, and I can tell you that I have had the same looks. I am 5 foot 8 and these retailers put everything so blasted high. Like they want me to scale the shelf and act like Superman....Non sense. They can come and help or they can stock their shelves correctly. I worked in a grocery store that they bosses were short sooooo.....the shelves were low too, it was awesome.

So I understand why you are feeling guilty, but there is no reason too, it happens to us too : )

Shorts, that is something I would do !!! LOVE IT !!
GAYLE