United Brachial Plexus Network, Inc.

yes - I hate that word too.... there's another word they sometimes use - it's "wraparound" - I hate both of them but I hate shadow worse! The shadow is the ADULT that follows Maia around like a shadow to make sure she is ok. But unfortunately it is her shadow that is causing much of our problems because she's scared to death.

I have been watching Maia in the playground now for a few days and it has been very eye opening... what I learned gave way to a conversation with her teacher..and this is what I told her basically

(1) if the class is outside for recess, then Maia is outside for recess - being inside with the class outside is unacceptible.

(2) if the class is moving around then Maia is moving around - if they are sitting then Maia is sitting... but if the class is moving around - Maia is NOT to sit at a table

(3) Maia is to be with her class and with her friends - not alone or just with an adult shadow or teacher - now that this damage has been done to Maia and to her classmates (in terms of fear) - much work has to be done now to encourage free play between Maia and others in her class

Then I went to the store and bought enough stuff to make up a huge bag with bags inside called ACtivity of the Day...

the daily ideas for a small group include:

- a walking club complete with special tags and a fanny pack with cards inside with activies at intervals - 10 jumping jacks, 10 claps, 5 hops on the right leg...etc.

- a nature club complete with binoculars, magnefying glass, bug container, shovel, compass, etc. with a card that I printed up that gives them ideas of what they can look for (worm, flying insect, butterfly, coccoon, spider web, birds nest, etc. etc.)

- a blow up baseball diamond game with velcro on it - rest it against the building and it comes with balls to toss on it

- a huge blow up cube (4X4') made out featherweight parachute material that they can toss around the play ground

- badminton and wacky birdy set

- sidewalk chalk and sidewalk dinosaur stencils

and more.....

I will teach Maia how each thing works so the she can show the small group and the shadow what to do...and each recess can be a different idea.

The teacher really tried to skirt the issue (if not plain out lie) about what Maia was doing during recess yet once I spoke about specifics (as though I knew more) she didn't deny what was going on. What is THAT About!! I told her that since Maia reported to us that she was stuck inside with her shadow, that I needed to learn more so I have been observing. Lou says I shouldn't have said that - oh well...I did it already.

So let's see what happens from here... I'll keep on observing next week and then on occasion.

that's the update
-francine

O.K. Red flag here for me.... this has nothing to do with all the other stuff...Which I agree you need to fight over.....I really think it is inappropriate for an adult to spend time alone with a child while all the rest of the kids are in a different place. Even in Boyscouts they have basic rules against that to prevent abuses.
Why do some teachers go into teaching if the parents have to do it all anyway!!!!!
That was a good idea about the bags, You're an awesome mom!!!

I want to introduce myself. My name is Kara Rutherford, I am from Wisconsin, I have a 2 1/2 year old son with a right BPI. We've been to Texas once for the primary surgery, and after an INTENSE observation... Dr. Laurent thought it would be best to wait. Good eye on his part. Jared (my son) gained great motion within the following months. After seeing Dr. Nath, at the Chicago BPI picnic (THANK YOU CHICAGO, again) we are going down to Texas for the mod quad surgery-end of October.
I also need to say thank you to Francine Litz. You truly have no idea how many times a day I visit your Maia's website. NO IDEA! All of my family members and friends have gone to your website to see "what happens" and watch the results. I cry and laugh, what a great family.
After reading this episode you are having with school, I am sick. I like to pretend that this will all go away, that Jared will NEVER need special attention. Reading this turns my stomach.
I did a little research. Is Maia in a public school? or private? Either way, there are many laws protecting children with disabilites and you have every right to go to that school and tell them that her outside time should not and will not be taken away. If it means talking to an attorney, you've got to do what you have to do. That is so wrong!

Tessie - the teacher said that Maia is given choices and that she DECIDES to stay inside! yearightsuremybu*t

so I asked her - "do any of the other children get a CHOICE to stay inside" to which of course she answered - yes for some circumstances - "what circumstances?" - if they are ill - to which I answered, "well Maia is not ill - so she needs to be out at every opportunity and this CHOICE is not hers to make" - kindergarteners are not given a choice as to whether or not they will take recess or where they will go during recess.... bunch of baloney.

BTW - here's something disturbing that's grating at me - when I went to pick Maia up for therapy (1 hour early) I learned from the office that the teacher CANCELLED the meeting I set up with the principal and the psychologist. The secretary said that we had worked it all out. Since I called the meeting, shouldn't I have been given the opportunity - at least question me - as to what I wanted to do?

Here's the other piece.... the teacher told me that Maia tries to use her arm but cannot use it well and it bothers her (the teacher) to see her use it. She said that she's scared she will be in pain.

So now I believe I should call another meeting with the whole team because something's gone very wrong here... how did "no monkeybars, no tug of war, no pushups" turn into Maia's not allowed to move her arm? not only is it NOT encouraged but it's DISCOURAGED!

This has become like whisper down the lane and everyone has it wrong!

[big sigh] just another day in the life of us moms eh?

Kara - welcome! and yes, Maia is in public school. Funny how that worked out - I really wanted her in private school (hoping that her settlement would allow us to do that - pipe dreams) because there would be a lower teacher/child ratio - but realized that it might be better for her in public school because of all the services and legal "protection"... amazing isn't it?

http://www.ideapractices.org all the laws are here...

also at this site http://www.wrightslaw.com - there are two books here that are worth the investment in

-francine

Francine:

I want to say that they (teacher/princial) would be crazy to think that Maia wouldn't come home & tell you that she stayed in another day for recess. First of all they better not think that your going to take their word on saying that things will be ok. I have never met you, but know enough from reading your post that you will fight this thing to make sure Maia gets what she deserves. She is as "normal" as any of the other kids. They are avoiding it like the plague. You know I hate they (shadow person) is afraid that Maia will hurt herself, but geez give me a break, that don't mean that Maia has to be kept away from all the activities other kids share in at playtime. I am so frustrated by this. I can't imagine what your feeling. The teacher said that it hurts her to see Maia use her "lefty". Well, hello!!! that is what ya'll have been working for, for her to USE her arm. Tell the teacher to get OVER IT!! People are so ignorant.

Take care,
Deanna

It hurts HER to see Maia use her arm???? Oh Puleeeze! Can you ask for a different teacher?

sorry, knee-jerk reaction. I know my daughters have bonded with their classmates already, so it would be better to try to get through to the teacher. I have trouble understanding her reaction when she works with children everyday - kids don't do things that hurt. She needs to get her head out of the ground & just use plain old common sense when it comes to Maia.

Jan - that seems to be what's missing in this whole thing...plain old common sense.... When my eldest daughter went to this kindergarten things were very different... kindergarteners weren't given written tests... Maia came home with a chapter one test - about inside and outside, on top and underneath...what's THAT about??? testing kindergarteners on a weekly basis????? it feels very wierd to me! My biggest problem is that I caught the teacher in 3 lies in our conversation and now I am having a head tizzy over it. Maia has some little friends now and she knows the "routine"... but this teacher who has been there for 30 years seems to be pretty full of it..as though she is untouchable. She got the wrong mom in her class this time that's for sure. Let's see what Monday brings... I delivered the bag of recess activities today.

-francine

Francine, Are you in WSD? Maybe you could go private? I hope you arent offended by that. But maybe a smaller class or all girls school? (boys are rougher)

Still thinking of you!

Wendi

hi wendi - we originally planned on this and then changed our minds because of the special needs services.... but we ARE rethinking...trust me I am rethinking just about every moment of every day! The school we were very interested in is 7:1 ratio actually. (Miquon)

offended? no way... thanks for your input!
-francine