I have a question for the adult OBPI's

This board is for adults and teens to discuss issues relating to BPI since birth (OBPI).
Kath
Posts: 3242
Joined: Mon Nov 18, 2002 4:11 pm
Injury Description, Date, extent, surgical intervention etc: I am ROBPI, global injury, Horner's Syndrome. No surgery but PT started at 2 weeks old under the direction of New York Hospital. I wore a brace 24/7 for the first 11 months of my life. I've never let my injury be used as an excuse not to do something. I've approach all things, in life, as a challenge. I approach anything new wondering if I can do it. I tried so many things I might never have tried, if I were not obpi. Being OBPI has made me strong, creative, more determined and persistent. I believe that being obpi has given me a very strong sense of humor and compassion for others.
Location: New York

Re: I have a question for the adult OBPI's

Post by Kath »

When I found UBPN at age 60 and read all the posts from Mom about how guilty they felt I was in pain.

I began to think about my Mom and realize how much she blamed her self for my injury. I think that was the first time I was angry at the doctor who did this to me.
He cause my mother so much pain. She never shared her pain with me when she was alive and for years I thought it was no big deal to my mother. It was just something we had to live with... It took camp and meeting with Mom's and daughters to see myself and my mother and realize just how much she suffered. I wish I had been able to tell her before she died that I never once thought it was her fault. I wish UBPN and bpi information and support was there for her. I am very proud at how open, caring and hard working my mother was without any help just LOVE.

Kath (robpi)
Kath robpi/adult

Kathleen Mallozzi
Andrea53
Posts: 44
Joined: Tue Jun 17, 2003 2:05 pm

Re: I have a question for the adult OBPI's

Post by Andrea53 »

I would have liked more compassion and understanding.53 yrs ago not alot was known.mom took me to the best hospitals and I had 3 surgeries.She was told to treat me like a normal child.I wasn't and it showed.PE was torture but I to was forced to take it.Never passed and kids made fun of me.
I don';t blame my parents.They did what they thought was right.Without the pushing I may not be as determined as I am today.Of course I'm totally disbled because it was disovered 10 yrs ago I have bpi in my rt as well as left.
Thanks for the question.
Andrea
Joanie
Posts: 499
Joined: Sat Aug 13, 2005 9:03 am

Re: I have a question for the adult OBPI's

Post by Joanie »

My mother felt guilty, too. She said that she had been thirsty throughout her pregnancy with me, and that she had quenched that thirst with grapes. Perhaps if she had not eaten so many grapes, I would not have gotten so large that I got stuck in her birth canal.

I pointed out to her that she had already told me that I was the only baby she carried to term. My siblings might have been the same size I was, if they had been carried to term. We don't know that the grapes had anything to do with it.

We didn't speak of it again. As I wrote above, my parents didn't often talk about things they found painful. I don't know how long my mother carried that burden of guilt.

Joanie
Carolyn J
Posts: 3424
Joined: Tue Apr 06, 2004 1:22 pm
Injury Description, Date, extent, surgical intervention etc: LOBPI. I am 77 yrs old and never had a name for my injuries until 2004 when I found UBPN at age 66.

My injuries are: LOBPI on upper body and Cerebrael Palsy on the lower left extremities. The only intervention I've had is a tendon transplant from my left leg to my left foot to enable flexing t age 24 in 1962. Before that, my foot would freeze without notice on the side when wearing heels AND I always did wear them at work "to fit in" I also stuttered until around age 18-19...just outgrew it...no therapy for it. Also suffered from very very low self esteem; severe Depression and Anxiety attacks started at menopause. I stuffed emotions and over-compensated in every thing I did to "fit in" and be "invisible". My injuries were Never addressed or talked about until age 66. I am a late bloomer!!!!!

I welcome any and all questions about "My Journey".
There is NO SUCH THING AS A DUMB QUESTION.
Sharing helps to Heal. HUGS do too.
Location: Tacoma WA
Contact:

Re: I have a question for the adult OBPI's

Post by Carolyn J »

I too, told my Mother before she died 6 years ago that I did not blame her or hold her responsible for my "Disability". She was 94 then, & this was the best "non-hurting" word for HER. She said in so many words that she did blame herself.
I do know she was at peace about it when the end came.

Hugs to everyone & CAMP 2007 or Bust!,
Carolyn J
LOBPI,Age 68 & proud of it!
Carolyn J
Adult LOBPI
admin
Site Admin
Posts: 19873
Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2009 9:59 pm

Re: I have a question for the adult OBPI's

Post by admin »

I think I might just cry....again.

My parents were great in that they didn't treat me any different which I think think helped me cope.
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