WOW Kimberly! That was such a great statement! You must have a tremendous amount of patience. You and your family really are so nice, and being that I have met you, I can honestly say that. I think it's great that you are able to stay home with your kids and respect anyone who has the patience to do so. Being that I am a working mom though, I also have a lot of respect for those who can balance working and raising a family at the same time. We just have to do things differently than stay at home parents. I really think the choice has to be up to you and no one but you. Good Luck with your desision!
Laura
need some advice-work or stay home
-
tylergsmom
- Posts: 282
- Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2004 6:56 pm
- Injury Description, Date, extent, surgical intervention etc: Hi! I am Laura, the mom of Tyler, who has a ROBPI. I've been a member of this site since 1998 and owe a great deal to the wonderful people in the UBPN community who have helped us along the way get what we needed to get done for Tyler. Tyler is now 14 years old and in the 9th grade. He's a super bright kid and loves his video games. Tyler had the mod quad surgery with Dr. Shenaq shortly before he passed. That was his first and only surgery. Now that he is older he is requesting additional surgery. He'd like to be able to supinate. Our goal is for Summer 2013.
- Location: Gulf Breeze, FL
Re: need some advice-work or stay home
Laura LeNoir, Mom of Tyler, Age 14, ROBPI
-
brandonsmom
- Posts: 1401
- Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2004 4:43 pm
Re: need some advice-work or stay home
I have worked all through my older three kids life. When my husband and I met, and after we got married he let me stay home. He was military and thought it would be too hard for me to balance three kids and his trips to the Persian Gulf, when I got pregnant we vowed that my son(not knowing he was going to be BPI) would never be in day care till he was 4. Well, we made that happen. I worked days and my husband worked nights. We put my son in day care at 4 and we continued out hectic....days off marriage so to speak. When my husband found a better job he let me decrease my hours this was last January. In August they laid me off. It took some whirlwind debt paying off, but we are making it fine and just bought our first home. I work ten hours a week....two days.....I am always home when the kids are home and I LOVE IT.
I volunteered last year at the kids school...in my son's first grade class....I thought he didn't appreciated it and then tha other day, he said,"Mom, will you come and work at my school again this year....." Of course my reply was yes. Staying home is not for everyone, I am blessed.....but you have to sharpen that pencil and see how much it will really hurt you. You'd be surprised how much money you save on gasoline, by not working.....Gayle mom of 4 (Brandon 7 ROBPI)
I volunteered last year at the kids school...in my son's first grade class....I thought he didn't appreciated it and then tha other day, he said,"Mom, will you come and work at my school again this year....." Of course my reply was yes. Staying home is not for everyone, I am blessed.....but you have to sharpen that pencil and see how much it will really hurt you. You'd be surprised how much money you save on gasoline, by not working.....Gayle mom of 4 (Brandon 7 ROBPI)
-
Lauren (mom to Brooke)
- Posts: 24
- Joined: Thu Jun 16, 2005 4:25 pm
Re: need some advice-work or stay home
Thank-you everyone for replying and sharing your experiences with me. I am still undecided, and intend to be until something knocks me upside the head. Ever feel that way, that an answer always blind sides you and then you wonder why it was ever such a tough decision?
Any more working moms want to tell their side of the story? Are you working out of necessity or because you genuinely want to? How is that working out for your family?
--sorry if I'm asking too personal of questions. I really do appreciate everyone's help.
Lauren
Any more working moms want to tell their side of the story? Are you working out of necessity or because you genuinely want to? How is that working out for your family?
--sorry if I'm asking too personal of questions. I really do appreciate everyone's help.
Lauren
-
Angela Butterfly
- Posts: 483
- Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2003 4:24 pm
Re: need some advice-work or stay home
Lauren,
When my children were ages 5,3,2 LOBPI. I opened a business. The year was 1986. The business I opened was a UNION commercial construction company. I did masonry sub-contract work (brick-block-stone) and answered to General Contractors, Architects, Engineers.
I did this out of necessity. My now ex=husband, was finally working at a regular job, and we needed to move (close to were work was and also closer to Chicago) still way south of City. He refused...and quit his job. I was to open this business, hire him and other union tradesmen (bricklayers & laborers)......which is what I did. Thus I was able to keep insurance....since he was my employee.....I paid the monthly union benefits on him, just as I did for all my employees. I was always working in different union locals.....so the paper work was tremendous. I did all the bookkeeping, payroll, taxes, etc and was the only office person.
When they were 2,3 5, my office was in the house.....in 1992 when they were 12, 10 9, we got an Office Trailer, and it sat beside my house. During the busy times, the girls were not to come out unless ther was an emergency and they were dieing or bleeding. When possible, I tried to go into the house when they got home from school.....It was also demanded that I make a HUGE evening meal.
It did give me some feedom to come and go. I was always dragging the kids along tho. Most jobs were an hour or more in all directions. We actually have 2 prisons in the county I live in.....so did a lot of construction work there to. Lots & lots of STATE government paper work. Also did commercial buildings, and churches, schools etc. In the early years, mostly additions to existing buildings. I got several mortgages against my house to finance my OPERATING loans. Any major screw up.... meant I was homeless. So much responsibility.
Always needed to run and get blueprints, frequently drove one hour, ran in, back on road again. In the early years, would jump in a truck and deliver material to a job site.....later a semi truck did the trick. Frequently I would do this & rush to get back for a kid to get off the bus, kindergarten 1/2, or pre-school, or all day. This was tough, since job sites so far away. School bus would only drop off at the same place....not allowed to request here & there if not on a regular basis.
The General Contractors, knew I was good about returning calls, so they left a message, and I called back when out. This did let me do Therapy appts. etc, AND do the school thing. Office calls always started coming in at 6:00 a.m. I was frequently putting up Jill's hair in a pony tail, and the phone would ring, before I could get the band on it.
My day started at 3:00 a.m. (I went to the office then) and when I could I would drop at 9:00 pm. When I had 3 jobsites going....sometimes if there was a problem (general contractor would call me)....the phone just had to do (a call to my foreman).
I finally got an O.P. in December 1995 and closed the business in 1998. Whenever I said I didn't want to do it anymore....he would tell me he would not work anywhere else ever......and since I did not have insurance for only 6 mos. out of every year(800 hours = one year insurance), prior to that....I knew he would do it.
When my children were ages 5,3,2 LOBPI. I opened a business. The year was 1986. The business I opened was a UNION commercial construction company. I did masonry sub-contract work (brick-block-stone) and answered to General Contractors, Architects, Engineers.
I did this out of necessity. My now ex=husband, was finally working at a regular job, and we needed to move (close to were work was and also closer to Chicago) still way south of City. He refused...and quit his job. I was to open this business, hire him and other union tradesmen (bricklayers & laborers)......which is what I did. Thus I was able to keep insurance....since he was my employee.....I paid the monthly union benefits on him, just as I did for all my employees. I was always working in different union locals.....so the paper work was tremendous. I did all the bookkeeping, payroll, taxes, etc and was the only office person.
When they were 2,3 5, my office was in the house.....in 1992 when they were 12, 10 9, we got an Office Trailer, and it sat beside my house. During the busy times, the girls were not to come out unless ther was an emergency and they were dieing or bleeding. When possible, I tried to go into the house when they got home from school.....It was also demanded that I make a HUGE evening meal.
It did give me some feedom to come and go. I was always dragging the kids along tho. Most jobs were an hour or more in all directions. We actually have 2 prisons in the county I live in.....so did a lot of construction work there to. Lots & lots of STATE government paper work. Also did commercial buildings, and churches, schools etc. In the early years, mostly additions to existing buildings. I got several mortgages against my house to finance my OPERATING loans. Any major screw up.... meant I was homeless. So much responsibility.
Always needed to run and get blueprints, frequently drove one hour, ran in, back on road again. In the early years, would jump in a truck and deliver material to a job site.....later a semi truck did the trick. Frequently I would do this & rush to get back for a kid to get off the bus, kindergarten 1/2, or pre-school, or all day. This was tough, since job sites so far away. School bus would only drop off at the same place....not allowed to request here & there if not on a regular basis.
The General Contractors, knew I was good about returning calls, so they left a message, and I called back when out. This did let me do Therapy appts. etc, AND do the school thing. Office calls always started coming in at 6:00 a.m. I was frequently putting up Jill's hair in a pony tail, and the phone would ring, before I could get the band on it.
My day started at 3:00 a.m. (I went to the office then) and when I could I would drop at 9:00 pm. When I had 3 jobsites going....sometimes if there was a problem (general contractor would call me)....the phone just had to do (a call to my foreman).
I finally got an O.P. in December 1995 and closed the business in 1998. Whenever I said I didn't want to do it anymore....he would tell me he would not work anywhere else ever......and since I did not have insurance for only 6 mos. out of every year(800 hours = one year insurance), prior to that....I knew he would do it.