adopting older child w/bpi

Forum for parents of injured who are seeking information from other parents or people living with the injury. All welcome
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admin
Site Admin
Posts: 19873
Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2009 9:59 pm

adopting older child w/bpi

Post by admin »

Hello - I am in the early stages of possibly adopting an older child with bpi. She turned 2 this past Dec. and I'm sure has had no surgery, and probably no therapy. Her medical reposts say both paralysis and limited mobility so I'm not sure how extensive her injury is. The photo I have shows her arm to appear quite flacid. I would like to know if anyone here has been through this: adopting an older child, and any improvement with surgery etc. around age 3 (which is how long before she'll be home probably.) Thank you!
Mary
ps I'm a midwife and it has been very interesting reading the messages at this site. I've had my share of shoulder dystocias, none with an injury thank g_d. The obstetrical wisdom on shoulder dystocia is that is can't be predicted - I know there are warning signs, but my worst ones have all been normal size babies, no GDM, normal second stage. Some of the birth stories I've read as I've investigated this from the (potential) parent side are so traumatic - the cautious, careful midwife that I am is horrified! Anyway, blessings to all, and thanks for any info you can share with me as a maybe-mama to one of these special kids!
crystal
Posts: 176
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2001 4:40 pm

Re: adopting older child w/bpi

Post by crystal »

I think someone on the board has a daughter they got later in life. once you have her and she is comfortable id do video and send it to TCH . that its not stress on her. plus its free.I hope everything goes well with the adoption.
francine
Posts: 3656
Joined: Mon Nov 05, 2001 12:52 pm

Re: adopting older child w/bpi

Post by francine »

Mary - I know another mom that adopted an older child with a bpi. I will give her your email and ask her to email you ok? Her name is Sandy.

It took courage to tell us that you are a midwife and to tell us about your experiences. Thank you for doing that! Here is the difference though - you have not injured children. You obviously know how to do the maneuvers and know how to dislodge a stuck baby with great success. I wish you could teach the others what you know!! Have you ever thought about doing that - honestly?

Mary - we have a very extensive Awareness section on this site that can provide you with tons of information.

http://ubpn.org/awareness
click the button on birth injuries and there you go...that should keep you busy for a little while! :)

Mary, not only have you prevented injuries to many other babies but you are now going to help one very special child. God Bless you for all that you do!

-francine

http://www.injurednewborn.com
http://www.injurednewborn.com/maia/homepage.html

admin
Site Admin
Posts: 19873
Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2009 9:59 pm

Re: adopting older child w/bpi

Post by admin »

Thank you Crystal and Francine for your replies. I'd love to talk with the other mom who adopted a child with bpi! Please feel free to forward my email to her (or anyone else you know of who has done this.)

And a note about my midwifery skills in terms of avoiding injury with dystocia cases: I've always felt like it was luck more than skill that I've never had a birth injury with any of my moms. Yes, there are maneuvers that one goes through to get the shoulders out, including the classic midwifery trick of flipping the mom over to all fours (hard to do in a narrow hospital bed with IVs, epidural, monitors, etc.). But I believe panic in the face of this true obstetrical emergency is what *can* lead to a bpi, and that can be hard to control. Again, thank g_d and knock wood that I've managed to get the shoulders out in a timely fashion. One last thing: the *fear* of a lawsuit is so pervasive in obstetrics now. I'm sad to say it can affect our practices, including open and sympathetic communication. If there was an injury with one of my births, I would probably be prevented by the hospital attorneys from even approaching the family to grieve with them. I would want to wrap my arms around the new mom and dad and cry with them and say "I'm so sorry this happened", and would be prevented from doing so. This saddens me to no end, and I pray I'll never have to experience it.

Again, thanks for your replies, and I'll keep you informed as I work to bring my new daughter home!

Mary
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