BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Forum for parents of injured who are seeking information from other parents or people living with the injury. All welcome
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BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Post by admin »

It's been a few years since the birth and I guess the problems resulting from the pregnancy and traumatic birth are not going to go away (wishful thinking, sigh). I know these are sensitive issues relating to recovery from childbirth...just wondering if anyone else with big babies and traumatic births also have similar problems.

I am looking at 2-3 future surgeries. One is for an umbilical hernia (where my belly button is - or was - it doesn't look at all the same). My muscles separated from such a big belly and a hernia resulted. It is very uncomfortable. I have a similar problem where the stitches were, that's going to be another surgery. Then there's the loose muscles, also from the big belly. The doc says a tummy tuck would help, but that sounds aweful to recover from and I'm sure insurance wouldn't cover it. How can I possibly have surgeries like these when I need to care for my child who also has had surgery and is still young and wants to be carried around? I've asked and there really aren't any exercises that will help repair these problems.

Anyway, sorry to vent about these sensitive issues, but just wondered if they were common with this group.
Thanks.
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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Post by admin »

yes. I have problems too. My biggest problem is incontenence of urine and bowel. Fortunately the bowel problem is getting a little better. Surgery has been recommended for the urine problem but I don't know how I could do it with taking care of my children much less financially! By the way, I know it is from the tramatic birth but no Doctor wants to admit it. It only happend after my last child and not with my earlier ones and they were all big babies! They just say that it can happen with big babies, Duh! Talk about duck and cover!
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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Post by admin »

I also have an umbilical hernia. I was told that is fairly common after pregnancy. Older people who have them often do nothing about them, but I was told I could wait a few years before having surgery if I had no pain; it's elective. The surgeon I saw said many people walk around with umbilical hernias for years with no problem. So unless there is big-time pain (indicating possible strangulation - which can be life-threatening if not treated promptly), there's no rush on surgery.

As for the tummy tuck - yeah, I could use it, too. Would I risk it? No way. I'll just do sit-ups, thank you very much.

Just curious ... do you also have rectus diastasis, where a triangle forms in your belly when you do a sit-up? Moderate exercise actually will correct that, I'm told.

Don't sweat the hernia, really - not unless your pain is severe. Often that hole is pretty small. I'd go for a consultation with a surgeon if I were you, if you haven't already. Take care.

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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Post by admin »

I also had trouble and was wondering the same thing about mothers of OBPI babies?? I sweat all the time, I am incontinent of bladder and there are muscles in my vaginal area that still hurt. My doctor-GP-just thinks I am crazy and wants to put me on medication I do not need. I think we need a study done on us too.
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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

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Luckily my physical problems went away, but I am left with this feeling of overwhelming sadness and I just fell like I can't get into the "swing" of things and my chils is almost 2. I have already been treated for anxiety and depression and they seem to have subsided, but I still feel screwed up somehow... Also, this injury and everything that goes with it (Don't even get me started about filing the lawsuit...)seems to just overshadow everything in my life. It is all consuming. I think that we may also suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I know that the birth of my injured child and the subsequent surgeries have been the most traumatic things I have ever endured. But as they say... That which does not kill us....Just my thoughts, but I am wondering if anybody else feels as screwed up as I do.
twinsxx2+one
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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Post by twinsxx2+one »

I think that the guilt is the worse part for me,(along with still wearing serenity pads daily!) The doctor came out and told me that it was my fault b/c of my size. So how should I feel?? I have never been back and he is 7mths old, not even for a post check-up!How do you pick another doctor? What do you day when they ask you why you left? My true feelings in a small town may not go over very well.
So, I put all my enery into my children, I learn as much as I can about this injury and I work that childs arm every chance I get! Because I have decided that this is one battle I will win!
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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Post by admin »

Guest,

I feel pretty screwed up at times too, so if it is any comfort please know you are not alone. Honestly though, I don't think we are swrewed up. I think this injury is devastating and knowing that it should have never happened is enough to create insanity. Having to further endure surgery after surgery and watching your child's deforminty and struggles everyday would be too much for any normal, feeling, caring, living human being. When you let yourself think and feel, it is such a darn heart breaker and to know others are injured every day breaks my heart even more. All of this is just so difficult to deal with. Some days are harder than others. Trying to find all the joy that we can in our daily lives with our children is essential and taking care of ourselves as well. I just hope you know you are SO not alone.
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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Post by admin »

Hi - I'm the original poster. About the hernia - I can't do sit-ups. My doctor said it's pretty big - and it hurts even to bend over. I didn't even mention the bowel problems, but it's difficult every day and it's gotten worse. I guess the episiotomy was so big and the stitches didn't hold so there is a "hernia" there too from it not healing properly and that affects my bowels. Embarrassing to talk about.

Anyway, to the guest that is incontinent - I switched OBs when I had a problem. I called my friend and asked who hers was and called and made an appt. It was that easy. He was very nice. And his office called the other office to get my records. On my first visit, he asked for a full history. Please consider making an appt to take care of yourself - you need to! (Listen to me calling the kettle black - lol).

This is a funny thread in a way - we are all being anonymous so it's hard to know how to respond to each other! Seriously, though, it's great that we have a place where we can come and talk about this. Thanks UPBN.
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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

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I still feel all screwed up and my daughter is over 3 years old. I can't seem to focus on things that I used to do well. I only feel "with it" to BPI. Nothing is going to pass by me unnoticed if it has to do with BPI. Also my periods never went back to normal either and I have alot of pain and swelling/bloating during that time too. Does anyone else? My new GYN just wants to put me on birth control pills to "make me more regular" but I don't think that is the problem.
KristieM
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Re: BPI Birth traumatic for Moms too - do you have problems too?

Post by KristieM »

I sustained fourth degree tears which left my rectal muscles "poor to very poor." I've also noticed an insane amount of visible bloating in my belly depending on what I eat and during my period. I've always gotten bloated, but not like this. As a Mom, it's so easy to put your child's BPI way ahead of your own medical concerns. I know I have. On bloated, incontinent days, I have moments when I just want to cry. However, I would have gladly taken more pain and abuse if my baby could have delivered without injury. I agree that what all of us is feeling is totally normal. I don't think we'd be normal if we weren't stressed, feeling vulnerable, depressed, etc.... I wish everyone luck with their babies and with regaining their old selves back.
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