Now it makes sense to me. I wasn't sure what your recent post was referring to, but now I do remember reading it and feeling saddened that you were questioned you in any way.
I also don't see anything about your post that would make me question you being a mother in any way. The last thing you need is to feel that you need to clarify "I AM A MOTHER". I think you asked a very good question and one many of us have pondered at times. It is all VERY confusing. Call me ignorant, trusting or whatever, but I don't see why any such post should rile anything up on these boards. PLEASE feel welcome to post your feelings and questions.
VERY CONFUSED on where to go/ who to see
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admin
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Re: VERY CONFUSED for Priscilla
Priscilla, please read this thread and you will see every Doctor has different way of doing things.
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Matt's Dad
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Re: VERY CONFUSED
I have to weigh in on this one.....
Yes, every doctor is different. Yes, some doctors we feel more comfortable with. Yes, sometimes we go to doctors that better fit our needs (financial, etc). But at some point, you have to realize a simple fact. Some doctors are just better than others, period. I'm not saying that in negative way, as if the doctor isn't any good. But some doctors are more aggressive and are willing to take on more risky procedures. Whether you want to admit it or not, there are some doctors out there who just have a better grasp on what needs to be done for our children. So yes, there are right and wrong doctors for our children. Whether parents want to recognize this is totally their decision. Why sugar coat things?
Yes, every doctor is different. Yes, some doctors we feel more comfortable with. Yes, sometimes we go to doctors that better fit our needs (financial, etc). But at some point, you have to realize a simple fact. Some doctors are just better than others, period. I'm not saying that in negative way, as if the doctor isn't any good. But some doctors are more aggressive and are willing to take on more risky procedures. Whether you want to admit it or not, there are some doctors out there who just have a better grasp on what needs to be done for our children. So yes, there are right and wrong doctors for our children. Whether parents want to recognize this is totally their decision. Why sugar coat things?
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Karen Hillyer
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Re: VERY CONFUSED
Matts dad - I do agree to a point with what you say - we all know that there are good doctors and doctors who are "not so good" in all walks of medicine, but I think that there aren't any "right or wrong Doctors" for our children - I think that there are right Doctors or wrong Doctors FOR PARENTS rather than children.
In my experience,parents will choose a practitioner or specialist for their child, with whom THEY (the parents) have some kind of rapport and for different parents that will be different approaches.
Some parents will prefer an aggressive approach and some a more conservative approach.
Just because a Doctor is more aggressive doesn't necessarilly mean that they have a "better grasp on what needs to be done for our children"
it just means they have a different approach.
over here in the Uk one of our leading experts in the field of treating BPI no longer performs nerve grafting as a matter of routine if there is no biceps recovery at 3 months. His approach has changed completely over the past 12 years and now he prefers not to do nerve grafting (primary surgery) but waits until the child is a little older and corrects muscle imbalances instead.
Who is to say which approach is right? if the surgeons themselves can change their opinions and methods then what hope do parents have of making the decision to choose the "right" doctor?
You can only make decisions based on what you know at the time - whether it's right or not - who can tell?
In my experience,parents will choose a practitioner or specialist for their child, with whom THEY (the parents) have some kind of rapport and for different parents that will be different approaches.
Some parents will prefer an aggressive approach and some a more conservative approach.
Just because a Doctor is more aggressive doesn't necessarilly mean that they have a "better grasp on what needs to be done for our children"
it just means they have a different approach.
over here in the Uk one of our leading experts in the field of treating BPI no longer performs nerve grafting as a matter of routine if there is no biceps recovery at 3 months. His approach has changed completely over the past 12 years and now he prefers not to do nerve grafting (primary surgery) but waits until the child is a little older and corrects muscle imbalances instead.
Who is to say which approach is right? if the surgeons themselves can change their opinions and methods then what hope do parents have of making the decision to choose the "right" doctor?
You can only make decisions based on what you know at the time - whether it's right or not - who can tell?
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admin
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Re: VERY CONFUSED
Karen:
I completely agree with you. Well said!
Krista
I completely agree with you. Well said!
Krista
Re: VERY CONFUSED on where to go/ who to see
The best reccomendation I can give is to choose a provider that you get a good feeling about and START there. You don't have to stay with that provider if you ever get concerned about the treatment path. You will learn A LOT along the way, and it is an overwhelming journey at first. Second opinions are always another way to check your choices. Francine's website is a great resource. Keep reading this message board, it is a wealth of information about therapy, therapy tools, surgeries, and lots of other little day-to-day stuff. I know that right now you feel like your head is spinning -been there. It will get better. Best wishes to you & your little one.
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admin
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Re: VERY CONFUSED on where to go/ who to see
I am confused about where to go also.We live in Ca.My daughter is 9.We were told years ago to wait till she was about 9 years old to have surgery.We have an appointment with Dr Vincent Hentz at Stanford University Hospital.Has anyone gone there? Any advice?
Re: VERY CONFUSED on where to go/ who to see
L. Connell, you should post a new message with different title so people can respond to you faster.
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admin
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Re: VERY CONFUSED on where to go/ who to see
New Parent,
I had to think for quite a while on how to answer this. Here is what I came up with. Think about first what you want to accomplish for your child. Then go to the medical resources website and get the names and websites of the different hospitals and doctors. Then research each doctor and hospital on their practices. Narrow it down to the ones who you feel have the same agenda that you have for your own child. E-mail each of those doctors with questions you have (i.e. when do you consider surgical intervention appropriate, what types of non surgical methods does your clinic offer? etc...) With that knowledge go with the one you feel has the best answer when it comes to the goals of your child. I think to often people only rely on the info they get from other parents and don't do the work of finding the right doctor themselves. There are to many followers out there change the pace do the research and be a leader for the other new parents out there. I believe making your own decision is much more satisfying than hoping the advice you take from another is the right answer. Good luck to you on your decision and I hope your child gets the help they need.
I had to think for quite a while on how to answer this. Here is what I came up with. Think about first what you want to accomplish for your child. Then go to the medical resources website and get the names and websites of the different hospitals and doctors. Then research each doctor and hospital on their practices. Narrow it down to the ones who you feel have the same agenda that you have for your own child. E-mail each of those doctors with questions you have (i.e. when do you consider surgical intervention appropriate, what types of non surgical methods does your clinic offer? etc...) With that knowledge go with the one you feel has the best answer when it comes to the goals of your child. I think to often people only rely on the info they get from other parents and don't do the work of finding the right doctor themselves. There are to many followers out there change the pace do the research and be a leader for the other new parents out there. I believe making your own decision is much more satisfying than hoping the advice you take from another is the right answer. Good luck to you on your decision and I hope your child gets the help they need.
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admin
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Re: VERY CONFUSED on where to go/ who to see
Guest,
I truly appreciated your post. Encouraging and empowering parents to THINK and RESEARCH on their own. Reminding us that there are many talented specialists to explore and find what best meets our child's current possible needs, EVEN if surgery may not be the best route, or so for our family it is not.
I think we forget how easily we can be influenced by other parents and this very message board without truly doing our own homework and thorough exploration of available resources. I remember back when I believed there was only one place to bring your child and that some parents held all the answers. I remember feeling that bpi specialists must have all the answers and that the best treatment was aggressiveness, no matter how many surgeries. Well, after my long journey, tons of soul searching and even more research, I have been enlightened. I wish when I first started this journey that I would have been fortunate enough to come across a post like yours. I had to learn it the hard and long way, all by myself. I guess I am just beyond greatful that I did. Thanks again for encouraging us to think for ourselves and to embrace all the possibilities out there.
I truly appreciated your post. Encouraging and empowering parents to THINK and RESEARCH on their own. Reminding us that there are many talented specialists to explore and find what best meets our child's current possible needs, EVEN if surgery may not be the best route, or so for our family it is not.
I think we forget how easily we can be influenced by other parents and this very message board without truly doing our own homework and thorough exploration of available resources. I remember back when I believed there was only one place to bring your child and that some parents held all the answers. I remember feeling that bpi specialists must have all the answers and that the best treatment was aggressiveness, no matter how many surgeries. Well, after my long journey, tons of soul searching and even more research, I have been enlightened. I wish when I first started this journey that I would have been fortunate enough to come across a post like yours. I had to learn it the hard and long way, all by myself. I guess I am just beyond greatful that I did. Thanks again for encouraging us to think for ourselves and to embrace all the possibilities out there.