For Those Who Choose Not to Sue

[TNT1999]

I know that it is a personal decision to sue or not and I respect everyone's individual rights to make that decision. I know some parents mention that they will leave that decision up to their child. Well, I would just like to give you all some suggestions. I don't know at what age a child will really be able to make that kind of decision. It seems that in most places, they probably have until they're 18 y.o. to file. Well, let's say they decide at around 16-18 y.o. that they do want to pursue a case legally. How likely do you think it will be that they will win anything or even find an attny who will take the case at that point? What are you doing now to help prepare their case? Do you think they will be able to acquire the medical records that far past?

Well, these are questions I think about when I read about parents not suing. So, if you are choosing not to sue, I would just like to leave some suggestions out there for you all to think about. How about if you do a little "homework" now to make this process easier for your child. You could sit down with anyone who was at the L&D and document everything that you can recall from the entire experience and even from the pregnancy too. You could write letters to the hospital requesting your L&D records and your child's birth records. You could write to your health care practitioner (former?) and request your prenatal records from him/her. You could request records from all of the doctors your child has ever seen for his/her injury and request the additional records from time to time, esp. therapy notes and definitely surgical reports, etc. You could also keep good documentation on all the countless dr appts and hours spent in therapy. You could keep track of all the medical expenses incurred with the injury. Then, store all of this information in a safe place for your child until the appropriate time.

Another thought, how about if you just have a consult with an attorney and request that they review (and have a medical expert review) the records and give you their opinion at no obligation. Perhaps you might even consult with a couple attorneys in the process. Who knows, you might be choosing not to sue right now b/c you don't feel that the dr. was negligent, but you might find in the process that there was negligence and/or medical malpractice. How would you know though if you never had an expert review the records?

Just remember that while we have to make decisions everyday in behalf of our children, we should also be prepared to justify such a decision as not suing someone who caused a permanent and severe (or moderate) injury to them. Ask yourself this, can I tell my child that I looked into this and in the end made a well-informed and educated decision? Only you yourself will know the answer to that question. I'm not accusing anyone of anything, just trying to lookout for the childrens' best interests and trying to give a peaceful reminder that it will likely be very very difficult for a child to take this to court after so much time has lapsed -- esp. if there isn't any documentation.

BTW, here's a little personal background so you all know where I'm coming from. When I was a child, I was injured from a bad fall in a bicycle that could have been avoided if the bicycle did not have a faulty brake cable. I was old enough at the time to know that the accident shouldn't have happened and that it was due to poor manufacturing. My parents talked about suing and decided against it (that's another whole story). Anyway, at that time and still to this day I sincerely believe that there was negligence and that we would've been successful in a lawsuit. I am the one who has a permanent scar on my face, a crooked tooth, and a crooked upper lip that I notice every time I see a picture of myself or smile in front of a mirror -- and I am the one who did not get any compensation. I forgive my parents, but it is not something I can forget when I get a visual reminder of it daily. I am thankful that the injury wasn't more severe b/c I know it could be much much worse. Well, there you have it. I hope no one is offended by my post and that at least one person will follow some of these suggestions and make things easier for their child in the future. Thank you for reading my thoughts and I welcome replies. -Tina

[frashley]

Thank you for your view Tina. I support all Parents and their individual choices and I wish each one the best.

[crystal]

Tina,
You emailed me when i first said i would not sue no matter what. Your words still Hunt my husband ( in a good way). you said if someone took you up to a roof and shuved you off. then at the last moment saved your life would you thank them for saving you. you said do your homework. well a week ago when Walters didn't take my case i saw my records for the first time. I cried for a week. i could not get out of bed. he said it was my fault and Jade was moving her arm vigrously. well her arm didn't move at all for the first 10 months.if it wasn't for you i would not know that he lied. so the story is, don't not sue until you do your home work.

[Paula]

I Have a question. so what if the parents do not want to sue and the child once older decides that they want to sue. What if the doctor no longer practices or passed away? what then?

[TNT1999]

Crystal, did I say that??? Well, I do remember discussing it, just didn't remember such a harsh scenario -- yikes. If I said that, I'm sorry. At that same time, I'm glad that I was able to help encourage you to at least look into it. I know that Jade has gone through a lot and I hope that you will be successful in helping to care for her financial needs. I also know that Lon doesn't take every case, even when the injury is severe, but keep looking and you will find a good attny who will take your case, esp. if it includes such a blatant lie. I know it must've been hard for you to read something like that from someone you trusted so much. Best wishes to you and your family. I hope your husband is doing well. Please pass on my apologies to him. -Tina

[TNT1999]

I don't know, Paula. Good questions. -Tina

[Paula]

Thanks Tina I thought so too so, maybe the parents need to think about that before leaving it up to the children to sue. After all, isn't that what we are here for to "take care" of our children. Just an angry mothers opinion.

[Kathleen]

Tina

I think that is a great idea!
Please even if you don't ever plan to sue....
get the records...save them... get all the information you can for your child...

When I was young you were not allowed to see your medical records only the doctor and medical staff did....

When I tried to locate my information and records I could not... so I had to be Sherlock Holmes...
I had a hospital bill with $10.00 charge for Cardiograph on the Baby... Why???
I had a card with a file number from NY hospital peds unit clinic (free) .. I knew what that was for-- medical attention and brace and care and teaching my parents how to do home therapy...

I finally hunted down where the records went when the hospital closed... only to find out the storage wherehouse where all the records were stored ----- burned down.

I was so disapointed... I wanted to read them... I am the one injured and it something I am entitled to know but now it is forever gone....I know what happened my Mom told me... but I did want to see what the records said...

I know I put my two cents in... but I pay for the medical and I know that it can be very expensive... but what if I could not... ??? I would have to do without proper medical attention because the doctor made a mistake... as I get older and we are both retired my medical may be different and I have been told that on medicare it is hard to get PT... these are all the things that each injured child will face.
Right now I have had so much massage therapy etc out of coverage... and my medical only allows for 30 visits a year and I have good coverage! After that thirty it is up to me... I used it all up in 6 months last year because of overuse on the unaffected arm... these are things to think about even though you are dealing with babies now... we do grow up....
I think having all the records for the kids is great....
good thoughts Tina...

Kath

[CW1992]

Great post Tina! Parents should keep all the records possible for their injured child. Keep everything!! The diary I was keeping regarding prenatal visits and what the doctor told me at each visit was very helpful - and keep all notes from all appointments. Not only is this needed for possible legal purposes later, but even right now so that you can put the pieces of the puzzle together yourself and see progress in your child. Kath also brought out so many good points. Why should the injured child who goes through so much already, also have to pay for the needed therapies, surgeries or other needs later in life because of someone elses mistake. I realize it is a very personal choice. Now that our suit is over I was mailed all of our files that the lawyers had gathered. I've been slowly going through them. I'm reading Doctor's notes, opinions, diagnosis of problems, charts, x-rays, prognosis', and so on and I kept thinking that all of this information should be given to us whether we decided to sue or not - we deserved to know everything there is to know about our child, and myself during pregnancy and her birth. It's our lives. Britt can have these files that can answer any of her questions. That's where my question came from - the post about how are injuries rated - I read in her file that she was classified as having a 'moderate' injury by one doctor. Another doctor thought mild to moderate, and so on. I am finding out things that I didn't know from those files. I knew that Britt had a very bad open wound on the top of her head from the vacuum, and that her head was scarred pretty badly - took her 12 months to grow some hair (bald baby), but I didn't know that the hospital put down that she had a "serious head trauma". They gave me ointment to apply and I was told to keep it covered with her little cap. I was told not to move her arm at all for two weeks after birth, but to make sure I double diapered her because her hip felt loose - all in her files. (It helps me too because it confirms my memory) I'm so glad that Brittney will know why we made the choices for her that we did. Just like Kath said - even if you do not plan to sue it is the child's right to know what happened to them. I know that I would want to know just as Kath did (I'm so sorry Kath that you couldn't get your records - they could have answered so many questions for you). I've rambled - but I think Tina's suggestions in her post could help so many injured little ones - get the records for them because they surely deserve to have them. Christy

[crystal]

NO NO NO dont apolagise thats what we needed to hear! It got the ball rolling and chris uses it when we explain to family who don't understand