Dressing by themselves

[tina arvizu]

When I picked Gabrielle up from therapy the other day they said they had some questions for me. They asked how she was doing dressing herself. Well I was taken back a little because I didn't think she was old enough even without an injury. She turned 3 a month ago. I though kids started dressing around age 4. She does like to help and we talk about it as I dress her. She can take her own shoes and socks off and shoe on. She does zippers if I start them. And she can pull up the front of her pants but I do the back. Should I be concerned? I don't want to push her. Good Golly it's hard enough to talk her into getting dressed at 3 years old! Any comments?

[Krista :o)]

I have a funny story...

Suvi is now 4 and she did not do too well with the dressing by herself.

Of course I helped because I thought she needed my help because of the injury.

Then her PT called me and said that Suvi had been dressing up alone for over 6 months in day care and therapy.

She had asked Suvi that "why does mother help you then?"

She had replied that "Mommy is so funny because she thinks I can't do this. I'm just fooling her."

Boy, did I feel stupid...

[LeeAnne]

Michaela was behind in dressing skills BIG TIME! But I also believe it has to do with the severity of the injury. She had the mental ability to know how, and tried desperately but would get frustrated and quit. As she got older she figured out how to do the one handed thing herself. The last thing which she finally accomplished a few weeks ago at 6 1/2 was putting on socks with one hand.She uses her left as a helper but does not have enough hand function to pull anything.
I used to worry about this so much but after talking to other mothers around me I realized they are all still dressing their kids mainly because of time issues. They'd never get to school if they waited on them to dress themselves. Next week and for the rest of the summer I am setting her alarm for 7, just like she was going to school,and setting a timer for 15 minutes in which she must be dressed. If done we will do fun summer stuff and go places. If she doesn't get dressed then we go nowhere. Hoping to get her doing it before school starts again.
I also think,like above, it's attention they get from us, not just ability.

[Sophie's Mom]

Sophie is two and loves to do everything herself - her big thing is "by mySELF!" I sneak in and silently help where I can just because I hate to see her struggle. She pulls up the pants int eh front and I sneak in to do the back (over the diaper). When the shirt is over her head and she can't see me, I give it a tug to get all the way on. I hold the shirt up a little so she can sneak her arms in, and with her injured arm, I tug the sleeve straight so she can "push" it through more easily. I often think that I help too much, that it would be better for her to struggle a little more while she's in this independent stage and while in the comfort of her home then not be able to do it later. My advice (and I need to take it myself) is to let them TRY and let them DO whatever they can and then fill in the gaps if they get frustrated. It's amazing how much they can do, though, and how good they feel about themselves when they accomplish something.
- Tina

[admin]

cant u ppeople dress your selfs

[LisaL]

Hannah's therapist and EI(She is only being monitored through EI) woman told me that at 18 months she should start to be able to take her socks and shoes off, and then start to put on her shirt and pants. Hannah is 18 months we are no where near this though. I do know some BPI children that can dress themselves at 3 years old. It may take them a little longer but they can do it.

Lisa

[claudia]

Kids really start to truly accomplish this task starting at 3.5 years. At 3 they are beginning it, but are often frustrated.

Last summer Juliana was in a camp group that had kids who were 6-8 months older than she. Since she is a November birthday, she had not yet turned 3 and these kids were 3.5. She really could not do much, but these kids could get their bathing suits off and get dressed alone. It made me nuts. One of my friends reminded me that Juliana is young and to give her time. Guess what--now, at 3.5 she had developed strategies for dressing. We worked on it. We tried different ways for her to do things, but she has found ways to do most things by herself. Mostly, one handed. So start now. Summer clothes are so nice and simple: pull-on shorts and tank tops!! Mind you, Juliana can not zip up pants or shorts or button them.

Even with non-bpi kids, self-dressing is a process. Kids love to do it themselves, so give yourself LOTS of time. I tell Juliana if she wants to do it herself, she has to start when I tell her to. If she doesn't, then I do it for her. She is rather motivated and she likes to do it herself. I like when she does it herself too!

good luck and happy dressing,
claudia

[Francine_Litz]

I NEVER thought Maia would be able to dress herself. We spent hours and hours of therapy time and home time to teach her how to dress herself and I just didn't think she could do it at all.

Well one day I was in the bathtub and she was dying to get in the tub with me... I told her that I was wet and couldn't help her get undressed and that if she really wanted to get in that she would have to do it herself... Well wouldn't ya know! It was almost as instant as instant gets!

It seemed to all go like that... Maia would fight the concept for months and then BOOM - she got it and no longer needed me.

We are still working on different things - zippers, buttons, velcro, snaps, different kind of shoes, bathing suits...and I'm sure we'll have to relearn quite a bit after she gets out of her splint...
just don't lose hope. One of the biggest motivations is peer pressure - if everyone else can do they will want to do it too (in time).

Dressing dolls or teddies with baby clothes is really helpful.

good luck,
francine

[LeeAnne]

I bought Michaela one of the dolls and she could do it on the doll, buttoning, zippers and snaps no problem but one handed buttoning and any type of pulling motion is hard due to the lack of hand for her. Also wiht no shoulder till Mod quad she was really behind. Just be patient with them . Like potty trasining they will do it when they have to. My biggest fear will be bras. How is she ever gonna do hooks one handed?

[Francine_Litz]

Lee Anne - she will hook it in the front and turn it around...or she will get front closing bras.