tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Treatments, Rehabilitation, and Recovery
tinapb
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2003 2:45 pm

tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by tinapb »

hi - i'm 37 and 5 years post tbpi following motorbike rta. have first baby due in august (getting on a bit i know!) and wondering if anyone has any advice on how to make life a little bit easier when looking after the bundle.
thanks
Kathleen M

Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by Kathleen M »

Hi Tina

I am glad you posted. I am sure someone here will be able to help you with all of the gadgets that are available for babies.

I think Jenny had the bucket link for bathing baby... I can't find it. I have some use of my right obpi hand and arm so I was able to give the babies a bath in the sink never in the tub I could not manage that.

I use to do everything on the floor with the baby for safety.

Kath
lizzyb
Posts: 809
Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2001 6:36 am

Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by lizzyb »

Hi Tina...congratulations on your forthcoming happy event!! Jen will probably post you a reply here (I think she's having computer problems...last time I heard from her she was doing a full virus check...)She has had all 3 of her children post BPI and is a wealth of knowledge when it comes to one-handed child care...and has invented several things and ways of coping, one of the being the 'baby bucket' which was an idea used by Dutch mums years ago.

The link to the baby bucket is http://tbpiukgroup.homestead.com/baby_bath_bucket.html
There are links on that page to other sites that might be useful for you too. Good luck..!

Liz B :0)
jennyb
Posts: 1183
Joined: Fri Nov 02, 2001 5:24 pm
Injury Description, Date, extent, surgical intervention etc: January 1980 Yamaha RD200 vs 16 wheeler truck, result, 1 totally paralysed right arm. I was 21, now 54. I had no surgery, I don't regret this. Decided to totally ignore limitations (easily done aged 21) adapted very quickly to one handed life, got married, had 3 kids, worked- the effect of the injury on my life (once the pain stopped being constant) was minimal and now, aged 54, I very rarely even think of it, unless I bash it or it gets cold, then I wish I'd had it amputated :) Except for a steering knob on my car, I have no adaptations to help with life, mainly because I honestly don't think of myself as disabled and the only thing I can't do is peel potatoes, which is definitely a good thing.

Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by jennyb »

Congratulations tina! 37 is not old at all, I was 36 and 40 for my last 2 births, and had my first at 29, 8 yrs post bpi.
Apart from bathing in a bucket and a lifting sling my mum made me, I didn't use any adaptive devices at all. The lifting sling is currently being used by one of the tbpi uk group members (our website is reachable from the link Lizzyb left) but when he's finished with it you can use it and welcome. I can see you are in the UK (using the term rta is a dead giveaway!)
In some ways i had it easier than other, able bodied mums, the midwives told them the 'right' way to do things, I couldn't do things that way so was free to devise my own methods, some of which raised a few eyebrows. Your partner better get used to nappy duty, I could do it but it was FAR easier for him with 2 hands so any time he was in the house, nappies were his job!
I couldn't support my newborns head and neck as well as other mums and as Kath said, I spent a lot of time on the floor. All 3 of mine had head/neck control far earlier than usual as a result and they all became mobile early, probably because I wouldn't carry them around. Seeing mum disappearing out of the room is quite an incentive to crawl.....potty training was later than usual, its hard enough for toddlers to get clothes off quickly in normal circumstances, with a one handed mum helping it's even harder :0) Potty training for my kids was running around naked all summer. I let all 3 of them decide when to discard nappies at night because no way was I lifting a hefty 3 yr old at night for toileting, and no way was I changing wet sheets, either. The older 2 were dry at night by their own choice aged 4, my youngest child is 4 now and as long as she is happy to have a nappy on at night I'm happy to let her-I know that some time she too will decide she doesn't need it. I have never had a single wet bed with any of them.
Breastfeeding is much easier than bottles, it's not easy to effectively clean and sterilise them with one hand and best of all you don't have to get out of bed at night. I did not find it easy getting breastfeeding established, problems positioning the baby with one arm etc, but I felt I had to persevere as I was adamant that bottles would in the end be so much more work, plus of course it's better for the baby to breastfeed for as long as I could manage. It took about 3 weeks but it was very much worth the effort for me.

A first baby is a confidence sapping process of trial and error for all new parents, regardless of the bpi. In my excperience yes, there will be challenges but they are not worse than those faced by all parents, just different. I'm sure you'll be fine but you can mail me anytime by clicking on my name.
Take care of yourself and make the most of the summer while you can :0)
bigsel
Posts: 72
Joined: Sun Dec 09, 2001 2:50 pm

Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by bigsel »

Just let things roll along nice & everything will just slip into place just fine, that's what happened to me, my first baby Mark was born when I was in the hospital after my tbpi, & I thought what am I going to do? how am I going to manage? in the end I got on no problem, Mark used to lye still when I changed his nappy(dyper) and when someone else changed it, he used to wriggle all the time. It was like he knew I had an injury & was using one hand, but I have to say it takes a bit of practice, I was in a right state the first few times I done it. So don't worry you'll get on jusy fine. Goodluck.
bigsel
Scottish tbpi.
tinapb
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2003 2:45 pm

Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by tinapb »

thanks for reply - have sorted baby bucket. very reasurring to have some input.
thanks again
tina
tinapb
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2003 2:45 pm

Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by tinapb »

sorted baby bucket - thanks. great to have some input.
tina
admin
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Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by admin »

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Gina071667
Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Mar 30, 2003 11:18 pm

Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by Gina071667 »

Hello, I was 12 weeks pregnant when my husband and I were hit by a semi truck. My arm was stuck to the grill of the semi thus causing a TBPI. My baby girl Madelyn was born on Feb. 16th and thus far has been healthy thank God. Taking care of her has been somewhat of a challenge for me, It gets frustrating because unlike you and Jenny I wasn't used to not having the use of my arm before giving birth to my daughter. I'am lucky to have a very supportive family who helps me a lot. My husband has been wonderful as well as my 15 year old daughter Ashley. I have noticed that Madelyn is more patient with me then with others, it is almost as if she knows mom is slower at things. Picking her up is by far the hardest for me. (overalls work well for lifting)LOL. One thing that is helpful is the packin play that has the bassinet and changing table attached to it, it makes it easy to pick her up. She is little though which also helps. (almost 3months and only 9 pounds). Another thing that helps is a stroller that unfolds and folds with only one hand I think ours is a Graco. Watch out when buying a carseat most require 2 working hands. I found a Graco that I can do with one hand. Also take all the help others offer and soon you will learn new ways to care for your baby. Let me know anything you fiqure out, and good luck.......

Gina
Susana
Posts: 161
Joined: Fri Nov 14, 2003 9:00 pm

Re: tbpi - first baby on the way - help!

Post by Susana »

I cannot bath or feed my baby holding her. Do you guys think this is because I got help. My Mom lives with me since my accident in 4/2003 and my baby was born in 9/2003
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